Thursday, December 1, 2016

This Just Gets Better Every Day

Meet your next Secretary of Defense

per the Fishwrap Of Record

60/40 we get our military back inside of a year.

Some quotes from Mattis:

1. “I don’t lose any sleep at night over the potential for failure. I cannot even spell the word.”
2. “The first time you blow someone away is not an insignificant event. That said, there are some assholes in the world that just need to be shot.”
3. “I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you fuck with me, I’ll kill you all.”
4. “Find the enemy that wants to end this experiment (in American democracy) and kill every one of them until they’re so sick of the killing that they leave us and our freedoms intact.”
5. “Marines don’t know how to spell the word defeat.”
6. “Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet.”
7. “The most important six inches on the battlefield is between your ears.”
8. “You are part of the world’s most feared and trusted force. Engage your brain before you engage your weapon.”
9. “There are hunters and there are victims. By your discipline, cunning, obedience and alertness, you will decide if you are a hunter or a victim.”
10. “No war is over until the enemy says it’s over. We may think it over, we may declare it over, but in fact, the enemy gets a vote.”
11. “There is nothing better than getting shot at and missed. It’s really great.”
12. “You cannot allow any of your people to avoid the brutal facts. If they start living in a dream world, it’s going to be bad.”
13. “You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn’t wear a veil. You know, guys like that ain’t got no manhood left anyway. So it’s a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them. Actually it’s quite fun to fight them, you know. It’s a hell of a hoot. It’s fun to shoot some people. I’ll be right up there with you. I like brawling.”
14. “I’m going to plead with you, do not cross us. Because if you do, the survivors will write about what we do here for 10,000 years.”
15. “Demonstrate to the world there is ‘No Better Friend, No Worse Enemy’ than a U.S. Marine.”
16. “Fight with a happy heart and strong spirit.”

Saturday, November 26, 2016

Castro Dead - Permanent Mardi Gras in Miami until New Years' !!!


Hey, Fidel? On your way down to the Seventh Circle, say "Hi" to your ol' buddy Che, you god damned bastard!

Tom Hayden, Janet Reno, and now the Cuban Mao - all in the same year!

Dammit! I could have won $1000 on the local radio station's Ghoul Pool.

And FTR, there's no way in hell Nostradamus predicted this, and the Cubs winning the Series, and President-elect Trump squashing Shrillary.
No F***ING WAY.

I'm calling Triple Dog Dare Bullsh*t on anyone who claims otherwise.
(Which, IIRC, requires that person to stick the tip of their male appendage to a frozen pole...
I'm not sure what happens after that, but I believe the fire department comes into play somewhere.)

Cuba Libre! in 3, 2,...






Thursday, November 24, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving


Enjoy the tryptophan haze, and the fact, for most of us, that we live in a land of plenty.

Make the most of the time, and do what you can to keep it like this long enough to hand off to your children.

No, You Magnificent Bastard, I Don't Want To Try Out That Weapon

Warning: Try not to blast today's meal on your screen.





































Dear BATFE: Is it legal to mount a Fleshlight on a SIG SB-15?

And yes, gentle readers, the BATFE responded.

I know today is Thanksgiving.
This is not the "stuffing" you were looking for.

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Well, That Didn't Take Long, Did It?



Team Trump shits the bed already: Hands off Shrillary.

Most administrations wait until they're in office to go full-diaper FUBAR.
This bunch couldn't make it two weeks without dropping a turd-log large enough to clog the plumbing, and they're still two months from even moving into the White House.

And if they follow through on this epically ass-tarded trial balloon
1) His own people are going to start wondering why they bothered
2) 300-something state electors will begin to have second thoughts before they meet in December
3) his mile-wide yellow streak revealed, both sides of the congressional aisle will start handing him his ass, starting on January 21st
(and yes, that would include every cabinet nomination, and his SCOTUS picks - well played, Lord Fartsniffer)
4) The RNC "Dump Trump In 2020 Committee" forms tomorrow, and it'll be fully funded
5) Darrell Issa, Trey Gowdy, and Jason Chaffetz may have a somewhat different idea of government oversight, and demand a special prosecutor anyways on Jan. 21st
6) Trump may find out that in a functional Department of Justice (as opposed to the Sturmabteilung we've had for the past 8 years), he can fire the AG, but he can't dictate policy when it comes to following the law. The sight of then-AG Jeff Sessions announcing the day after he's confirmed that Trump's wishes mean jack and shit in regard to enforcing federal statutes would bring tears to anyone's eyes who loves equality of all men under the law
7) Trump will also find out, just like Shrillary would have, that lacking HopeyDopey's Magical Anti-Gravity Teflon Pigment, firing his AG for pursuing investigations and prosecution of Shrillary would result in a bill of impeachment by noon that day, and achieve a House vote of 435-0, before his afternoon removal, and the accession to power of Acting President Pence. His ass would actually leave skidmarks out the White House portico, it'd be over so fast.

The Trumptards, predictably, will now be forced into pretzel-like contortions to defend this lunacy.

Or saner heads on the transition team will convince Trump to STFU, and tiptoe quietly away from this elephantine mound of dung, and disavow any knowledge of its source.
















Monday, November 21, 2016

The Cacophony!



I refer anyone curious to the following exchange of ideas at WRSA .
(If you were busy re-arranging your sock drawer, and have better things to do with your time, I understand.)

Well, heavens to betsy, I seem to have kicked over a few folks' compost heap of treasures.

For the TL;DR folks, a linked essay espoused the idea of secession.

The notion is farcical.
The clever reader with average comprehension will note that nowhere therein did I state in reply that it will never happen, nor that it will never be attempted.

So for the rest, without naming names, who ran about like headless chickens slaying straw men and waving the internet e-penises, that makes the ripostes posted pretty pointless.
And then, predictably, comes the descent to ad hominem, ever the last refuge of a weak (let alone non-existent) argument.

Anybody who thinks they're going to successfully secede is a historical ignoramus. The very concept is comedy relief.
If there's a United States as such, the attempt will turn out about as well as the last one.

Anyone wishing to have a go should, by all means, give it their best try.
Have fun storming the castle.

But some there are honestly perplexed, including the gracious host there, and who ask reasonable questions. For them, the following:

You want to know how we find (if ever such can be done) our way back to the USA that was.
Some observations.

1) We didn't get here overnight.
Depending on whom you ask, things started to go to shite in the US of A anywhere back as early as the actual Constitutional convention. Or the Whiskey Rebellion. Or Marbury v. Madison. Or Lincoln. Or when they cancelled My Mother, The Car. Whatever. The one thing nearly everyone agrees upon, per recent polling data, is that we're on the wrong track, and have been so for some good amount of time.

2) It follows then that it is childishly magical thinking to imagine that we will find our way back to where we want to go overnight either. Secession is just one Mad Lib answer penciled into the box of We Get Back To Proto-USA By _________________.
As I stated in my reply at the referenced site, that's simply a recipe for Lebanon, Zimbabwe, and/or the former Yugoslavia. (For the truly weak-minded, that means it isn't impossible, just that it will be an endless epically biblical shitstorm for anyone who goes there. If one has any wits, the reference to Lebanon, Zimbabwe, and the former Yugoslavia should have been a rather large foreshadowing of that conclusion. YMMV. It does NOT mean none of the jacktards milling around now are too smart to try it anyways. Nothing is foolproof, because fools are so ingenious.)

3) If we're not in the right place, and not on the right track, and not going to get back there overnight, there are therefore three options:
a) We get to a worse place overnight.
b) We get to a different place, at whatever speed.
c) We restore what better place we used to have, over time.

"A" is easy. History is rife with examples.
"B" is Magic Beans and hokum, based on facts not in evidence at any time in world history.
Once again, have fun storming the castle, show your work, and understand that you're probably just taking the long way around the tree to get to "A".
"C" is annoying to most people, because it takes time, patience, intelligence, planning, discipline, and a methodical bloody-mindedness that would tire a bulldog.
It is neither impossible, nor easy. What it is, is doable.

It is a truism that anyone telling you how to "get rich quick" is looking to separate you from your wallet. A wise person elects to "get rich slowly", by using common sense and discipline to achieve their desired state, and avoiding rash, impatient stupidity.

The same is true for fixing a complicated machine that's broken.

Everyone's favorite bugaboo is "What about the ____million @$$holes who want to take your stuff, or vote it to themselves (thus having the gubmint steal it on their behalf)". It is also a truism that anyone advocating robbing Peter to pay Paul can count on Paul's support.

The answer to how you undo the malign intentions of 10, 20, 47, or 62% of your nominal countrymen is to starve the goddam beast, and break it to your will.

"But-but-but...they have academia, the media, and the bureaucracy!"
"So the fuck WHAT?!? DRAIN. THE. SWAMP!"

How many worthless eaters would be moping around causing trouble if their student loans dried up overnight? How many colleges could they hide in if that gravy train went away? How many communist hack refugees from the 1960s could live on tenure if their institution depended on delivering value for the dollars spent, absent any government support for the endeavor for anyone not working towards actual useful skills like engineering, law, medicine, et al? Anyone want to see those old hippies pushing a broom, or greeting at WalMart? Beuller? Beuller...??
Turn the money spigot off. Game over.

That also undoes a few dozen film and journalism schools.
Papers and TV would have to report reality, not propaganda.
Movies would have to reflect the audience's tastes, not anti-American claptrap.
Strike two.

Oh, and BTW, politics is downstream from culture, and ALWAYS has been. Try sending your second or third kid into the arts, and kick the leftist bastards off the top of that hill, or get used to losing the cultural war forever. You can't give your enemies a safe space, and when the right bailed out of anything, like they did cultural pursuits, we started getting a steady and endless diet of shitburgers.
So when someone said "Enough!", and we got talk radio and the internet, how did that work out for the Left?
When it comes to news today, "Who run Bartertown?"
 
You tell me...
Is it this guy?

Or this guy?

And which one is the candy-ass?

And just like the fights that chickenshits ran from for fifty years and more, we're going to have to go back in, and kick the shit out of the left for fifty years more to take them all back.
Failure is contagious. So is success. Every time we take back another hill, we have that much less to go, and that much more territory to exploit.

And third, you're going to have to take back the government. That means doing to the bureaucracy, and to union employment, at every level - which is overwhelmingly public sector unions - what happened to PATCO in 1981, and Wisconsin teachers in the early 2000s. It's going to be mean, ugly, nasty, and brutal. And absolutely necessary.

You take out the government unions, you defund the opposition by the time Trump is out of office in 4 or 8 years.
You take back education and defund academia, and you get back the next generation.
You take back media and the culture, and you salt the soil they used to shit in to grow their foetid brew of the current crop of sugar-coated safe-space triggered crybabypants Special Snowflake Social Justice Whiners. For. EVER.

Put THEIR goddam frog in the frying pan for a change, and spend every day turning up the heat.

You get Normandy, you got Caen.
You got Caen, you get Cherbourg.
You get Cherbourg, you take Paris.
You get Paris, you take Berlin.
And then that big boat ride home.


Or, you can just fall back on pussing out, and planning to die on some little hill, dreaming of better days.

How did that work for you from, say, 1960 through last week?
Maybe not so bitchin? Then maybe quit yours.

You want a little defensible slice of heaven on earth?
A Galt's Gulch?
Camp TheWholeWorldCanKissMyAss?
For prudent just-in-case? Or simple everyday peace and quiet?
Hey nifty, me too.

That's today. Maybe tomorrow.

What about the day after that?
If that's all you want, that's all you'll ever get.
And maybe not even that.

You turn a nation around, and resurrect an entire culture, you've got a shot at the world.

Or you can bunker in, and pretty much count on the other side regrouping.
And then you'll get shot at by the world.

And if all you want is to be the shitlord of your own little mound of cow dung after you help pull the entire civilization down in flames, save time: kill yourself, and go rule in Hell.

If, in the meantime, the other side decides to take this to the streets, we can accelerate the transition with suitable application of therapeutic lead injections.

You want easy, switch sides, and let Uncle Sam be your daddy.

I know what I'm choosing. Trump is just a beachhead. Not the grand prize.


Irony Sweepstakes Grand Prize



So apparently some of the prancing gender-dysphoric retards appearing in Hamilton in NYFC took the occasion of the attendance at their clown show of VP-elect Mike Pence to do some ad lib anti-Trump booing at certain strategic points throughout the show's performance, by way of protesting the epic schlonging their preferred and defeated multiple felon received from Trump/Pence earlier this month.

Aside from the general and egregious boorishness of hired monkeys insulting a paying guest, there's this serendipitous litter box nugget for these historical jackasses to nurse on:
Alexander Hamilton, the eponymous basis of the entire musical in question, was also the man who invented and championed the Electoral College, and its inclusion in the US Constitution.


Suck that turdcicle, you ignorant public school drop-out bitchez!



Sunday, November 20, 2016

Contentment


                             This guy has a start on the right idea.

The fall rains are here at last (or it may just be torrential hippie liberal tears over the election's serendipitous aftermath), life is comfortable in many ways, and yesterday, in honor of National Ammo Day, I added to the pile a healthy amount of 12 ga. #4 Buck, and .223 62gr FMJ. And there's at least one more fun show coming up before the curtain closes betwixt Califrutopia, and the ammo purchasing behavior of a free country.

Good luck enforcing that nonsense, you Sacramento f***tards; I have the time and inclination to travel, and what I bring home is my business, not yours.

(And proof that the perpetual ongoing shortage hereabouts of .22LR is now entirely a result of deliberate manufacturing machinations, is that .17HMR is available at 1/2 to 1/3 the price of .22LR on the same shelves, if you can find any of the latter. That they have the capacity to produce similar ammunition at half the price documents that makers are deliberately choosing not to, and marking up the "shortage" .22LR at gouge-worthy prices. Bastards.)

The point of the exercise is mainly to remind TPTB what a task they face if they think they've got a shot (no pun intended) at being our literal masters, rather than servants. That info is delivered when they see the excise taxes paid on ammo purchased; hence the special day. (Pity no one seems to have told the idjits running things at the retail level; they're usually falling all over themselves to find some holiday excuse for a sale flyer the other 364 days a year, to include Arbor Day and Lithuanian-American Day.) Nothing I acquired was in shortage hereabouts, nor will be anytime soon. But it makes the periodic panic-buying a curiosity, rather than a problem.

Hope you made the most of the time as well.

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

EPIC

h/t to WRSA


Here's to you, Mr. Know Your Meme Genius, this Bud's for you, a Real American Hero.
And whoever you are, you're also funny as hell.

Thursday, November 10, 2016

Inside Baseball

NYFC, Aesociated Press:

Sources have supplied this blog with a photograph of President-elect Trump meeting with his defeated rival, Shrillary Milhous Capone Crybabypants, to talk about the post-election results:


Several sources close to the Trump campaign have stated off the record that as the blow was struck, he yelled "You're FIRED!".

If you're in any way interested, you've probably seen the videos of the poor widdle wambs at Shrillary's Hindenburg party Tuesday night, wetting their hankies and their diapers as they found out it was all going down in flames.

There are also some further press releases from the Trump campaign:

I'm going to keep enjoying Tuesday night, until the Usual Douchenozzles finally wake up, and start trying pathetically to offer some resistance.
Although at this point, that's about like criminals facing lions in the Roman Colosseum resolving to try to taste bad.

In the meantime, we offer this salve for what ails them, as a public service:






Happy Birthday, Youse Sonsabitchez



On this date in history, in Philadelphia, in His Majesty's Royal Colony of Pennsylvania, in a local dive bar (where else?) near the wharf, at Water Street and Tun Alley, the first Marine to enlist for service with the regiments authorized by the Continental Congress under command of the first Commandant of the Marine Corps, Capt. Samuel Nicholas, turned to the second Marine to sign up, and said
"Listen up, boot, the Old Corps was tougher back when I came through..."

In the 241 years since, they've made some wee mark on history by handling their enemies with all the tender loving care a tyrannosaur visits on a side of fresh meat, giving lesser mortals something to which to aspire, and turning no small number of formerly directionless miscreants into professional, disciplined killing machines seldom if ever surpassed in the annals of fighting men.

To every one of them, past and present, who earn the title they bear every day, we hoist a ceremonial tankard, wish them our best, and bid them recall, as by the blood stripes we ourselves earned, to salute our absent comrades left behind in every clime and place their nation and their duty called them. 

May we all be in heaven half an hour before the Devil knows we're dead! Semper Fi!

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Movie Review: Hacksaw Ridge


 


In case anyone was wondering, I did go to the movies yesterday, as promised, due to the ongoing suspense of what turned into yesterday's epic liberal-spanking tsunami.

I saw Hacksaw Ridge.

And I offer the following in-depth review.

Gibson just outdid Spielberg's Saving Private Ryan with a tale from reality instead of fiction, and outdid Eastwood's Flags Of Our Fathers/Letters From Iwo Jima bookends with a story more hopeful than either of his.

This movie, screened at Cannes, received a ten-minute standing ovation when it concluded. The French may not know much, but they know great cinema when it smacks them in the face.

My take?
Best Picture nominee.
Best Director nominee.

Get thee hence, and see this.
Now.

That is all.

A Caution From Literature


               I HATE orange! Orange jumpsuit FOREVER?!? Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!

Boys and girls, today's celebratory repast of liberal tears, with band music provided by the weeping and wailing, is well-deserved.

But let us not forget the literary example:

Just because the Eye of Mordor has fallen, many of us still have plenty of work to do in cleansing our respective Shires of that troublesome taint of stupidity.

Evil has been vanquished today, but it is only a start. Some multiple TRILLIONS of unfunded debt still loom on the horizon, preparing to deliver the financial meltdown the policies of Obozo designed them expressly to accomplish; today is only a pause to breathe.

If you see weapons, ammunition, long-term food, and/or other suitable preparation supplies at yard-sale prices, level up, and go bullish and long.

We are in that place noted by Winston Churchill:

"This is not the beginning of the end. But it is, we may say, the end of the beginning."


Meanwhile, I haven't yet been tapped for the Presidential Transition team Senior Advisor position, but I'm available if called, and happy to continue to consult via the Internet. So I humbly offer the following:

Rudy Giuliani, AG
I’m hoping he goes for retired LtGen Mattis for SecDef.
Allen West for Natl Sec Advisor.
Newt Gingrich, Sec State.

Giuliani’s second job, after Shrillary’s federal reckoning, will be to put Comey out for cause, and get somebody into FBI to begin the 20-year process of getting their integrity back.

Disband DHS, abolish the TSA, and rein in the NSA and IRS.

And when Trump starts construction on The Wall, we’ll have found those 100,000 shovel-ready jobs that have evaded Obozo’s notice for 8 years.

Trump should also tell Obozo that if he lifts one finger to try and grant Clinton, Lynch, Holder, et al any presidential pardon/amnesty, the next day, proceedings will begin that hour to research his actual birthplace and certificate of live birth, and retroactively nullify every act he committed as moot and vacated, including every judge and justice he appointed, every law and act he signed, and any nominal pardons. Game over.

The first act of the new Congress is either a full repeal of Obamacare, which Trump signs 10 minutes later, or else it’s back on like DonkeyKong with his entire electoral base.

Excuse me now, I have to go pee on the local DNC HQ.

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Epicaricacy


Open your hymnals to page 1:

 
 
Now all we need is for a little congressional interest to throw some water on Shrillary and some light on her activities, without the ham-fisted faux investigations of the FBI to get in the way.


And while you're up, I'd like world peace, and a pony.

What is best in life? As always:

Ms. Too Drunk To Concede's epic bitchrant later will be epic, and anticlimactic, but worth suffering through this long election season to hear.
And the fucktards in the GOP who produced Trump, and volcanic levels of discontent in the party base by lying, weaseling, crawfishing, and generally wussing out to Obozo for 8 years are going to get extra scoops of $#!^ in their $#!^ sandwiches for the next 4-8 years.
(Bitch McConjob, Quisling Ryan, Marco Amnesty, John Kasbitch, call your offices.)

Hey, hear that dripping?

It's Liberal tears!
And it's on the menu non-stop for the next four fucking years! Maybe even EIGHT!
Bwahahahahahahaha!








Tsunami Warning



This could be YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE!

If Trump hits 270, even money Shrillary and Bill are in a non-extradition country by noon tomorrow.




Hands. Eyes. Assembly required.



I'm off today, once I get home.
I'm going to the polls, then I'm going to be shopping for odds and ends, and I'll probably catch a flick. (Hacksaw Ridge looks like a safe bet.)

Beyond that, there's no point in getting interested in things any earlier than about 5PM PST.
If Trump pulls FL, NC, VA, and pries loose PA and/or OH, this could be an epic F. U. to the media pundits, and their chosen Felon.

If he doesn't do that, it's going to be like watching the Hindenburg come in to Lakehurst for a landing, in slow motion, over and over and over again.

All that's at stake is whether the country finally throws the brakes on eight years of the current obamination, and declines to elect a women more corrupt, before she ever gets to the Oval Office, than the administrations of Grant, Harding, Nixon, and her husband, combined.

Or whether instead we collectively vote ourselves into a perpetual banana republic.

It's rare to know that a given day will presage the course of a generation, as the sun is barely breaking over it.
And I could have lived without the knowledge this time around too.

The only thing tempering the possible dread is the knowledge that in less than twenty-four hours, things should be decided.

I can cross my fingers, and hope for the least awful outcome between the horns of two turdburgers.
But I'd just as soon not watch the roulette ball rolling around waiting for the answer of which slot into which it will drop.
And besides, there's still a lot of work to do, either way.

                                                       TINVOWOOT